women need to find their love of men to be with one

This phrase came through talking to a friend about a recent breakup.
It’s a piece that took me many years in my dating life to see head-on.
I had to let go of all of the ways men had wronged me, betrayed me, bullied me and taken advantage of me to reach a place where I could truly meet one (the right one) with love.
I had to remove the lens of victimhood so I could recognize love as love.
I had to see all the ways I had participated in their treatment of me- with compassion for where I was at the time, but with total responsibility. On some level- conscious or unconscious I had chosen every person and every circumstance. Each situation where I felt wronged, I got to play out many stories, but the biggest one said that said men cannot be trusted.
I had to find my love of men. Without needing to get anything. In total appreciation for their differences. Find my gratitude for the way they showed up for me, took care of me and wanted to learn and do better.
This doesn’t excuse bad behavior or their parts in our stories, but responsibility is power and freedom.