on coaching

I’ve struggled with how to relate to social media over the years. it isn’t my pace- I’m much slower. But it’s such an amazing tool- a way to connect with so many people that I would never otherwise meet or spend time with, especially now in mom mode.

I have so many creative projects bubbling. So many things to write and plan and execute. Pent up energy from the last 18 months of being on the floor pregnant and postpartum.

And it’s one foot in front of the other. Prioritizing my body, prioritizing my baby and husband. There are just quick moments where I can write half a thing or play with creations. And then there is the scrolling addiction that steals time also- the consumption that makes me compare my insides to everyone’s outsides. 

I can feel things starting to gain momentum now, though. I’m getting reliable childcare lined up. I’m sleeping better, even though it’s not enough. I’m excited to work with people again.

Which leads me to something i’ve wanted to outline for a while. 

The ‘coaching’ industry gives me total cringe.  There is such a gambit of styles, modalities, skills and approaches- if you’ve even peeked into the world it’s immediately overwhelming and usually kinda gross. There is a lot of ‘quick fix’ style personal development work out there.

I was a personal development junky for several years. Looking for someone on the outside to come in and validate me, figure out what wasn’t working for me and fix it. To save me.  It wasn’t until I took full responsibility for my journey that the right guides (coaches/mentors/facilitators) started showing up and things started to truly shift for me. For at least a couple of years I spent most weekends reading, writing, crying, watching and meditating. 

The first guide I worked with gave me the victim consciousness work that is at the foundation of my belief system (highly recommend looking up Lynn Forrest’s work). This work is never ending and continues to unfold.  She helped me see how my role as rescuer and victim in my family had shaped my relationships up to that point.

The next was an Akashic Records guide and holder. I still don’t have a great mental picture of what this means lol but I was held so beautifully through a huge transition in my life and was able to really get ready for the next chapter because of her holding.

Then I entered the community I’ve been with now since the start of lockdown in 2020. Led by Perri Chase, there’s nothing else like it anywhere. I’ll spend more time digesting and sharing the work I’ve done in her and her teams’ spaces in future posts but radical responsibility is the foremost value. Full expression, connection with desire. Because of this work, my nervous system is being rewired. I can hold others through their transformations. I can show up for all of my relationships with my family and friends with presence and honesty. I have a new relationship to work, to myself and to my body. It was because of this work I did my doula training and was able to bring Selene earthside, at home, unmedicated.  The list goes on and on. It will be unfolding for years. 

I say all of this to say, if you feel the call to work with me, please reach out. We’ll have a call and see what fits best for you. I’ll be holding a group on intimate relationship work starting in January and have some space for 1:1 work also.

I also want to say a word about counseling.  Coaching is not counseling. It’s guidance and mentorship and in my specific space, it’s from a spiritual perspective. Counseling was a huge help to me for many years prior to starting this different sort of work and I have respect for it, it is just very different from the work I do or anyone in my community does. We have very clear agreements about the work and the boundaries within it. Responsibility for our own journeys and reactions is key.

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on writing

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women need to find their love of men to be with one